Sunday, November 30, 2014

When I grow up I'd like to be...

So my sister shared the below pic on our Whatsapp group.

She mentioned that she liked where Albert is heading. I also totally agree with her.

PR eventually saw the message and this is what he had to say.

Is no-one going to lock up David and throw away the key? He'll grow up to become the joker

"Some people just like to see the world burn"

And let's be honest.. Only Albert is going to achieve his goal.

Toby will commit suicide..

Sophia being female wont get to play in the major leagues and will end up being a meth addict who strips to get high.

Violet will get so obese that she will live and die alone.

Isabelle and Lylla will do the white swan/black swan thing and then go insane and then kill each other.

Anthony will get thrown out of a flying school for calling a plane a jet flyer.
He becomes a meth dealer and that's how he meets Sophia.
Who kills him with a porn star heel to the throat
And steals his meth
OD's and dies in the street 

Albert stays at home and writes a simple formula that makes him famous

and never combs his hair again.

This is what happens when you send a joke to an analyst!!!

Happy last day of November!!! 

Wednesday, August 13, 2014

What Guys Really Talk About When Girls Aren't Around

I was checking PR's phone for in-appropriate material (like any good wife would) I stumbled upon this insightful conversation between him and his BFF - a prime example for guy talk perhaps. 

and I was like...

Thursday, May 29, 2014

Got 100% Serious Problem??

OK People, I have got the answer to all your problems. Especially your 100% serious problem.  Please continue reading and your life will be changed forever. 

After a very long time,I took an auto last week. Those of you who have been reading my blog would know about the fiasco that happened in my last auto ride.

We were waiting at the traffic signal and this guy went around throwing business cards into all the autos. I was one of the lucky few to get this card and being a very selfless person, I decided to share it with you all.

As you can see that we will get the relief within hours and it is !!! his Promise !!! The guru charges a very nominal amount of Rs 251 per session. 

As you can see he favors no particular religion and treats everyone. 

Now the question would be, what are his expertise?? Don't you worry, he's covered that too. 

He's got super nature knowledge in all problems and looks like his specialty is in Love. 

I'm gonna stop right here and make a call if this stuff actually works.  I hope to get Ryan Gosling in a couple of hours!! So excited!!

PR if you are reading this, this is all an experiment, its not like I LOVE Ryan. OK FINE I do. If it works, you can get whomever you want. 

This stuff better work, otherwise i'm releasing my dragons onto him. FYI in my house, I'm now referred to as Khaleesi. 

Sorry couldn't stop myself from having a Game of Thrones reference as PR and I have been binge watching GoT. Love Love the show!!

Wednesday, February 12, 2014

Turning 30

I was dreading writing this post. OK, let me just say it out loud so that it wont sound so awful.

I turned the big 3O. 

There I said it. I hope you all are happy. I had a cousin point out to me that I need to change my About me description on the blog which says a 20 something female to a 30 something old lady

Well the joke's on all of you. 

I had one of the best birthdays ever.

I stayed up for almost 23 hours non stop which I never did in my teens or 20s. So there my 30s just became a whole lot cooler. 
I danced till my feet hurt, then removed my shoes and continued to dance more.
Awesome food and awesome company just makes things like turning 30 a lot better. 

I really thought I would go all Rachel or Joey on turning 30. 

I ended up being a combination of Phoebe and Monica. For all those youngsters who have no clue on what this "oldie" is talking about. 

Please watch this

Friends - Whey They Turn Thirty

I am honestly glad that I grew up in the 90s and early 2000's and not now.

I can't believe the  crap the youngsters listen to and follow. I am glad that I can look back and tell my future generation that this was the era that the rest of us were totally ashamed of. Find below are my reasons. 

Case 1:

Case 2:

Case 3:

I rest my case!!!

Friday, January 24, 2014

2014 and New Year Resolutions Rant

Happy 2014 everyone! Yes I know I'm delayed by 24 days in my wishes. Let's just pretend that I just woke up now after my so awesome New Year celebrations. The word to focus is pretend

And if anyone is wondering what I got for Christmas. This is what I got. 

I always get it every Christmas, actually pretty much through out the year. I keep telling myself to get rid of my old gifts and this year I did take a step and joined the gym. I mean I have joined gyms earlier but this time i did go for more than a week. Fine I'll be honest, I went 8 days which is technically more than a week. 

I would be like, Yes Ryan, I'm working it out all for you.  I was like i'm gona do 60 squats and 60 lunges and will try this shit called 'PLANK'. I mean its easy as a pie and not much effort.  Those who don't know what a plank is. Please refer the first image in the below picture.

Please refer to the second image to see how I looked when I did a plank.

I did not give up, No sireee. I even took two steps further to even control my diet too along with my exercise.
Then last week, the unfortunate happened, I fell sick. I had fever and couldn't go to the gym. I was reading an article the other day where they were talking about how people give up on their New year resolutions on the 24th of Jan and it is called as 'Fail Friday'.

Today is the day!

I was determined that I am not gonna be part of that statistic. I'll stand out and be different. And yes, I woke up bright and early after almost a week and was like 'Nothing's gonna stop me today from exercising'.

First point of failure was once I reached the gym and was changing into my gym shoes and I realized that in my enthusiasm I picked up PR's shoes. I was getting annoyed and to the fact that I walked to gym which is like a 10 min walk, ok fine, 5 min walk in the freezing cold in a frigging Delhi morning. I should be awarded just for braving the cold. 

Then to add fuel to the fire, while walking back into my apartment, I twisted my ankle. Don't ask me how or why. I just did cuz I have a weak ankle. 

I am HANGRY! Hangry Hangry Hangry!!! 

OK I have calmed down, introspected and realized that I don't need no exercise. I am perfect the way I am just like Calvin.

If anyone has a problem with the way I look then you can all 

Okay then, that's it for now. I need to find a snickers bar after all the ranting! 

Good Bye